It ain't EVEN that serious!

I've found, over the last, let's say week or so, that some stuff just ain't that serious. As I said to you I've moved back home and getting settled is always consuming. So I've been away from the computer and from some of my regular correspondences and so on. I don't pay my cell phone...and unfortunately the person who does recently got into some financial straits, so my phone is temporarily (I hope..lol) off. So I haven't recieved many calls...with the exception of about 3 of the persistent who've chased me down @ my otha number. At first I was distressed about the lack of communication with certain folx, stressed about not keeping up with my blogspot...and all that kinda thing. Then one day I just decided that aw, it ain't that serious...I'm not gonna die without it...lol
I was talking to my girl today. She told me that an aquaintance of ours and she would be going out on Friday. I immediately felt myself getting a little possesive. I had to slow my roll...I've always been very protective of my friends, but I've matured a lot and when I feel those sorts of feelings now, I get a grip. I had to take a deep breathe and realize (again) that her other relationships DON'T have any bearing on our relationship. Come on Chan! It's not that serious...so I woo saaah'ed and let it go.
On another note, I have a slightly older (10 or so yrs) male "friend"...who has been that for about 18months now. He has always been consistent and sometimes convenient. So to speak. I was talking to him the other day and while we were on the phone he was flirting with another woman(at his gig)...all the while calling me baby and asking when was I coming to visit. So I say to him "hey, u need me to call u back?" He insists that I stay on the phone. Then he puts me on hold. So after about point 2 seconds I bang. "I'll be dag on..." (lol) So he calls back like babe, why u hang up? I coulda told him but you know what???.....that's right it ain't that serious. So we kept talking and he asked me to come over and since I was frying fish for dinner to bring him a plate. I said "I'll be there." We hung up. I said to myself "humph, I ain't going." Listen, I am not even a little bit beat to have this man even pretend to think like he's playing me...another youngin in his arsenal...no sir. It ain't even serious like that, so I stayed home.
Continuing on, I called my self being stressed out about some fake, non existent...even if it did exist meaningless drama between myself and whoever. I took a step back from the situation and thought...are you kidding me? In the big scheme of things, and stuff that matters this don't. To each it's own...experience is a teacher...I ain't got anotha word to say, cause it really ain't even serious like that.
The same thing goes for the crap I been dealing with from my ex...pish posh. I confided in him something that had happened to me that was so embarrasing and hurtful that I'd only told two other people in earnest. Do you know this guy told my kids and made a joke out of it? After pretending to be supportive. My kids? They r babies...they didn't even know what they were saying when they repeated his words. I confronted him on it and he just laughed it off. God brought that to my remembrance today....He doesn't love me. Even though he says he does, all the time. He doesn't wish the best for me...to him it's all competition...to me it has always been love. But you know what??? I thank God for freedom and clarity...If you're reading...man, you think you still got control...but whatever has held me in the past, it ain't that serious...and it's in the past.

*Ain't no feeling like being free When your mind's made up

And your hearts in the right place, yeah

Ain't no feeling like being free

When you've done all you could

but was misunderstood

(It's all good, it's all good)

Ain't no feeling like being free

I'm like an eagle set free

finally I'm looking out for me

Ain't no feeling like being free

Cause my minds made up

And my heart is in the right place, yeah

Life is too short to get caught up and twisted up in stressin over a bunch of things that are meaningless...you know?

o btw, I have a "semi" internet stalker...it's kinda crazy. Dood just popped up outta no where. He sent me a nice email or two, so I sent one back and said thanx for the nice words...ever since i done got about 12 consecutive emails...that kinda got me trippin. So I'm like whoa man! I mean, I'm sure you're cool and all...but 12 emails in a row...is it that serious??

*Ne way... to any of ya'll that still stop thru and show a sista luv by reading and by saying wssup in my comments...thanx.