j is going through today. i really care about him. how do i know? because i was so willing to put my plans and desires on hold this weekend, so that i can help him out in a jam. that is significant to me. i realize that in general i am a very giving person, and perhaps had anyone other friends called with some drama i may have been as eager to help. but i don't know.
i would argue that my willingness to help wouldn't be, if my feelings for him and my relationship with him was based on any shallow thing.
this isn't about giving money or giving time, rather about heartfelt love and concern. motivated out of nothing really.
God has shown me that kind of unmerited love and favor. i strive to give it to others. altho most don't understand or trust it.
i await the day that a man will love me in a similar way. not because of anything i've done, or have, not because of my looks, but just because he has chosen to love me.
i have faith and hope for my future relationship.
in the meantime, i'm happy to develop that selfless love within my self for others, my children, family, and friends.
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