Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Fighting Discouragement

How are we supposed to handle disappointment? What if we plan something for our whole life and it fails, falls apart, or worse never happens. What if we've had our hope in the divine to bring about change and the expected change doesn't come.
How can faith persist, when it seemingly brings about no results? These are the questions in my mind right now. Then I have to wonder if I'm missing a bigger picture. I feel aimless, although that's not the truth. I feel flimsy, and without foundation. It's like being in an earthquake. When everything that you trusted to be still and sturdy starts moving like water, uncertain, unstable, frightening. Maybe it isn't my job to figure things out. But it seems like no matter how much I pray, I don't know when to step out on faith. So far when I have, I've fallen on my face. I know God is able. . . so it's me. What am I missing.
They say the darkest hour is right before the day. So now I'm just trying to fight discouragement, and depression. I'm trying to keep the tears and anxieties from drowning me.
Trying to hold on to hope...trying to keep the faith.
I keep being told that God has great for me, Please Lord show me! I'm in desperate need of a breakthrough.
Until it comes....I'ma keep looking up.

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