You Might Not Like This Entry

The best thing in my life is knowing Jesus Christ. Throughout my blog I've talked about the Lord, but sometimes I get a weird feeling like maybe I shouldn't mention Him since I have different kinds of readers. The bottom line is that if I have no one, in fact when I have no one Christ is there.

I didn't have anything to blog about, at least nothing that wasn't too private to share. I came across the song "Do You Know" by Michelle Williams, and altho I'm not a huge fan, the song spoke to me. I had to fight the tears. I knew I had to come write about what I was feeling. KNOWING I'm risking not being interesting...but it's my blog, my feelings.
Right now I'm dealing with a recurrent heartache. I can't say too much about it but it is an issue that will be as long as I live. This is why I'm at the place where God is changing me. My prayer..."Lord take the hurt and anger away completely! Make it so that I can face this situation with out any emotion. Give me the serenity to accept the things I can't change and the strength to move on and put my assurance in You." Sometimes I want to cry, I get pissed, I want to scream. Sometimes it seems like the people who have done me harm just move on in life and are happy, unscathed and even blessed. I need God's help to refocus my attentions on the blessings He has given me, and just know that no matter what, He cares and has my back.
I also found out this weekend that someone who I have been a friend to has been slandering me. And while anyone who knows me knows how empty his words are, it just hurts.
I thank God for His love, His faithfulness, His friendship.
I told ya'll before in my "A Love Just for Me" entry how much I longed for that physical manifestation of love. I miss having a companion, someone to go out with, talk to, watch tv with....all of that. But I am so grateful that even if it never manifests again, the love I experience with Christ can't be matched. I've experienced the Spirit of God so intimately. When the presence of the Lord is imminent the tears flow, and there is no other explanation. I've tried understanding, tried labeling them, but it is just a sign of the Holy Spirit within me.
People want to deny the Lord. They wanna do things their way and only talk to Him when things get rough. But a world, a people without Christ is hopeless. He loves us so much, He is so patient with us. Thank you Lord.
We just mess it all up on our own. I'm not all about "religion" not all about the things that church folx expect...to me it's just about the Love of the Lord. Nothing is more refreshing, sweet, intimate, or transforming.

You may never read my blog again, but know that today you coming was not by chance. God loves you. He loves you better and more than anyone ever has. He doesn't want anything from you more than your love. The Bible says that if you Love Him following His commandments will come natural. But don't be mistaken God doesn't expect perfection. He knows we are imperfect and our frame is but dust. Still in spite of our frailty He consistently loves us, protects, and provides for us. If you haven't already give Him a try. If you wanna talk, if you are confused, hurt, or just want to hear more about Christ in my life please email or im me...I'll respond quickly. chandra_b_1999@yahoo.com
It's okay to be who you are, to have fun, to date, to laugh, to dress nice...being a child of God doesn't mean you have to be wack.lol
Trust me, you won't find those qualities in me. (smile)
The Bible says where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is Liberty! If you want to be free get with me, better yet get with the Lord! :)

P.S. Ok no more "preachy" blog entries...at least for a little anyway... ok??

So much love to ya'll!