what's in a (GHETTO) name?

i was on the phone with a newly made buddy last night. i guess he decided to probe me and engaged me in conversation about "ghetto" names ie: Shaquanda, Rashida, and Rakim. So I proceed to express my disdain for such names, and he immmediately takes in to me about how I and other Bill Cosby thinkin-suburbanite-uppity nigros think. He assumed from my feelings about such names that I thought down on the people and culture those names typically represent. man ol' man. so when i could finally get him quiet i made my argument...tell me what u think.(this is not to be offensive to those with such names)

1. he argued that names like Shaquanda, and Jabari come from the continent of Africa. Therefore we should take these types of names as to not conceed to white America.

• my rebuttal: while this may be true, these names are often not chosen for these enlightened reasons. Most times young girls just like how they sound or think the name would be cute in some gold hoop earrings. why do i say this? 'cause there are tons of beautiful african names that the same people who name thier kids names like Raqshiqaniqua would never consider...for example, how many Dacia, Adanna,Adjatay or Mashudus do you know in the hood?? Not to mention, we are not from Africa. Sorry to say it, but we're from here. Sure we have African roots,but I don't even know what part of Africa my people came from...African names are often associated more with one country than another...not just continental

2. he insisted that using such continental names would instill a sense of self pride and heritage in our children.

• my question: But at what expense? When discussing names that betray race just by hearing them...you may very well be adding to the strikes against your black child. Case in point, a brilliant black young man, with a high school gpa above a 4.0. His parents proudly named him Malik (an african name) with a common last name like Jenkins. Malik applies to Harvard...and before his application is even read, his name suggests that he is black, and it is thus either not fairly considered or just straight out denied. (quota's been reached) This is also true for credit applications, mortgages and so on. Why choose names that over the past 25-30 years have become associated with the stereotypical African-American? This isn't about the name itself..or the value of such a name, rather the reality of America. You can still choose a less stereotypical African name.

3. he believed that not embracing these names reflects self hatered and denial.

• my answer: i love being black. i appreciate the hardships that we've faced as Americans. i am not ashamed of my African heritage. still, i am American and i have to live here. i like names like Chase and Brooke, as well as Aja & Amayah. i am no uncle tom nigro who's shucking and jiving just to please massa. BUT reality is America ain't out to help me (a black woman) and neither my sons. i have to make choices to help us. so if that means i don't name my son Rashid or Malik to give him an extra chance at a level playing ground, so be it.

so that's that. we went back and forth for a few, but since I don't do the debate thing much I insisted that we agree to kinda disagree.

on another note: i'm new to this blog thing and i feel like i've missed so much. i don't think i have many readers...but that'll soon change. i was reading some other folx stuff and learned about the meme phenomena. so i have decided to do mine...but i don't know if it's against blog rules to have 2 entries in one day...oh screw it who cares? i'll make my own dag on rules...i'll b back to do that joint in a few hours. in tha meantime, please comment. don't sneak and read my stuff and not tell me u was here. that ain't right!

luv ya!