Thursday, September 21, 2006

fyi

just wanted u all to know my grand daddy died a few hours ago.
i feel like i don't know what to do.
i have to leave for california this weekend.
pray for our family.

~chan

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

The Hapz With Diamonds??

so...
i figured i'd blog and update u all a little bit.
it looks like before Christmas i'll be returning to the blog world full force (or at least with more force..lol)
i am stilllllllllllll in the home buying process which is CRAZY. but God.

where do i start???

well i'm happy. the kids are GREAT, my twinz just turned 6 yesterday!!!
*clapping*
and u know me, so u KNOW i'm throwing yet anotha party...lol
but it'll b this weekend at an undisclosed location and an undisclosed
time and date (i have internet stalkers....*smh)

but i've invited about 10 kids and i already got my goodie bags all
set up. i think my daddy is buying tha cake and i'm doing the rest...
the place that we are going will entertain the kids and that's a load off
at least i don't have to get a clown or get up and act silly myself to
keep them happy....*i've done that in the past too..lol*

since the twinz are in 2 classes i had to take 48 cupcakes to school.
i couldn't get over the number of cupcakes...i'm still in shock. (lol)
but they had a GREAT time and that's all i care about. :)

i have two other properties to show her...so i'm just believing it will still work out.

my kids are loving school and want to sign up for EVERYTHING. i feel lost cause i want them to do everything they wanna do, but i just can't. we missed football season, but basketball season is here and my daughter wants to dance, and they all wanna do the SCOUTS and they are all in drama class through my church. Nothing is free mind you, so it can be overwhelming at times.
So i'm just trying to figure out what to say yes to and what to say next time to....hmmm???


i bought Beyonce's cd "BDAY" and u already know what I'm gon say huh??? I LOVEDED IT!!! lol yes, that's right I wrote LOVE-DED...lol
two songs on there i could do without, but i really dig it.
it's definitely different but everynow and then me and the kids put it
on and be gettin bodied!! lol
we all be dancin and laughin at each other *priceless*
oooh...and i got it at walmart b4 they sold out so i got the dvd too!

um les see....what else? i'm still in luv wit myspace. oh well....i luv my fam and we really keep in touch thru it. also i'm singing in a new group...which is great. it's me, another woman (Tasha) who brings out the ABSOLUTE best in me and a great guy (Marcus)...who plays for us and ALWAYS can hear our parts and help us. (he'z da bomb!)
we already got a gig on sunday...can u believe it??
God ain't no joke when He do what He do!!!

i used to direct the youth choir and b the youth director at my church a few years back. i was ousted out of the director position and resigned from the choir position. well, i have been ask to step back in....and honestly i'm amazed and grateful and happy to step into place.
we are doing a back to skool skate next month and we are starting our own Gospel Cafe' in conjunction with a much larger and established cafe' that runs in philly...

so things are moving. you know, that's how life is.
it moves and we can either stand with our jaws dropped as it rushes by
or we can grab the reigns and move with it.
i kept feelin stagnant, my growth didn't feel evident....
but in time all things come to the light, and i'm seeing the light.
that's a great thing.

oh b4 i run...on the dating front (since i alwayz tell u ALL my biz)
i am totally single. i done had to kick Leron to tha curb for the
ump-teenth time. *hehehe*
a nice guy met me (u like how i put that) and he has
not been shy in pursuing me. while it is nice, right now i'm
so clear on the fact that now is just not the time in my life
for anything serious. he's sweet tho, and saved, and got a good job.

In the meantime, i'm single and enjoying being mommy and
making something worthwhile out of my life.

whew! long post, but i had a lot to tell u...more to come REAL soon.

Chan "Diamonds, rubies....n so on"




Thursday, September 14, 2006

Can't Stop Crying (poetic prose)

*a song inspired this...and altho i've had all these feelings before, it really isn't that bad right now, i'm moving on in my life and i'm very happy to be FREE.

You made me cry
so many times.
loving u wasn't easy,
gave u my whole life.
i wish u appreciated
the woman i am.
prayed and stood by your side
and today i stand alone.
your babies i carried
make it hard to let go.
another man...
sees what you left of me.
i remember feeling
like i wasn't good enuf.
what did she have on me?
u said goodbye
like
everything is alright.
and when it's all over
i still stand alone
tears
rolling
down
my face,
trickles down my pillow
an endless stream.
and i don't even
want u no more
just want the hurt to go
just want the rewards
for being so good in love.
and right when i think
it's all over,
these eyes well up
the dam breaks
the flood falls...
a broken heart
that can't be mended.
a broken woman
that just don't get it
why?
i glanced in the mirror
and i'm entranced at
the glassy eyes looking back
trying to trap
those illusive drops
but
they
won't
be
held
back
for the last coupla years
i haven't stopped cryin
and just cause u
can't see the tears
don't mean a thing
cause
i'm cryin inside.
somewhere there's healing for me
the mourning 's gon' leave...
these precious tears
i don' cried have
been counted and
are worst than blood
on your hands...
i'm wait'n
but for now
it hurts so bad
that i
cant help but cry...
Chandra Wood 9/06

Sunday, September 03, 2006

checkin in


just wanted to come thru and say hey to all u blogger people.
i turned 26 on friday, and it was a nice day.
well it rained pretty much all day...and i laid around and did nothing.
i'm not too mad about that cause that was all i wanted to do anyway.
i did take myself out to the cheese cake factory and yesterday
someone took me to see that movie CRANK...which was out of control, by the way.
but, my cousin met me at the cheesecake factory and we had a nice dinner...
we both did a lot of talking and reflecting about where we are in our lives now
at 26 and being single moms and the future and all that.
overall it was a nice day.
i'm blessed to have seen another year and i'll catch up wit u folx in a little.
something wonderful is in the works, we'll talk soon. :)

in the meantime enjoy ur labor day!
luv u!
~chan